“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

Nelson Mandela.

So let us depart on our journey for significance, and rise to be heroes.


My slipper broke. Gah. Wow. I went out with dad and justin because mum was sick. To buy acrylic paint(Popular sucks lah, but my crocs are done)

And Justin was just being a pain in the butt. Gosh. So we went to eat. and dad lectured justin about his studies, and bucking up. I saw Dad in a new light today. totally underestimated the guy. I never realised I wasn't that close to Dad.

He told me about how he was introduced to Christ. And how his childhood was hard, with mama waking up at 4am everyday to sell chicken rice. He told me about the struggle. He told me that he was a hopeless rebel last time. And how he changed.

It was pretty darn inspiring. But Justin... I don't know. he totally hates the whole family now, for telling him that he's not performing his best. We're like seriously damn worried for him. Because of him, I fear the future.

To think what will happen when my parents will return to God. And I'll be alone with him. He'll be a failure? I really hope not. But what if he is. And I don't even know what I'm going to do in the future. I have no clue. I'm trying to be independent, but all i see now is Justin freeloading off me, and splurging and wasting my earnings.

I... I just can't imagine what he's going to do. And he hates me a whole lot more now, because he THINKS that mum and dad want him to live up to MY expectations. IDK, it's something every younger sibling faces right? I don't know, i've never had to live up to any standards other than my own.

You know what was Dad's motivation? His neighbour in the lift one day, he was some exeutive snob thing, and in the lift, he told his son who was of the same age "Son, You know, never be like that boy. All muddy,dirty and useless. This type will never make it"

he was referring to dad. Dad was outraged. Wow, to hear that as a 10 year old, I would have like taken up drugs or something. but thank GOD that Dad's friend brought him to church. And he really changed.

hats off to Dad.

Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.

I'll pray for brother.

Labels: fear